


Ownership

by BendyDick



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Jim's Dead, M/M, Post Reichenbach, angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-28
Updated: 2014-02-28
Packaged: 2018-01-14 01:33:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1247773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BendyDick/pseuds/BendyDick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sebastian and Richard mourn in very different ways but at least they have each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ownership

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a anon on tumblr. Not my best work but at least I started writing again am-I-right?

It wasn't like Sebastian didn't know what it felt like to lose someone, it's not like Jim's death came as a shock. He'd been in the army; he'd had watched as his men died in his arms. He was used to the empty feeling that replaced all the feelings he'd felt for Jim. He knew how to make himself numb. 

Richard didn't though. Richard felt that awful ache every time he he woke up and didn't see his brother's face. He couldn't ignore the hollowness that hung around him that made sure he didn't forget how Jim had looked when Sebastian brought him back in a body bag. How dark eyes his brother's eyes had been,but they weren't Jim's dark eyes, they were empty. Jim wasn't there anymore and nothing Richard or Sebastian could do could bring him back. 

The little Moriarty walked around sniffling for weeks after they'd buried him. He didn't talk to anyone but himself and even then all he did was curse himself for being weak. Sebastian knew he should have felt something, anything other than numb. It was like his emotions were lagging and it only registered to him when he saw how sad Rich was. The solider wished that for once he could command himself just to feel something. Anything. His boss was six feet under. His lover was buried in an unmarked grave so that police wouldn't start looking. His life was falling apart and he couldn't even manage a good cry. 

"He's dead you know," Richard pipped from behind a large cup of tea, Sebastian hadn't noticed him enter the kitchen but the man had always been very quite. "He isn't coming back. He used to tease me as a child, tell me he knew I didn't love him and that if I didn't love him he had no reason to live. He'd pretend to kill himself and I'd cry but he'd come back and make it all better. He'd tell me he knew I'd always love him and that he'd never leave me. He isn't coming back this time is he?" 

Sebastian stared at the man, half thinking he was pathetic and half understanding that Richard was in mourning, it was a normal thing to want dead people to come back. "Nope. He's dead kid. Stone cold and rotting underground." He let out a chuckle and didn't realize that what he said was bad until Richard's brown eyes went huge and the mug shattered across the floor. Sebastian could hear the man sobbing in Jim's old room, no doubt curled up in the sheets he refused to wash, but he didn't make a move to comfort him. 

The pair went back to their silence. Richard didn't bother trying to sort through his emotions with Sebastian. He knew better than to be mad at the man though, it wasn't his fault he didn't feel anything. The days passed the way they had in the last few weeks of summer break. Where the excitement of freedom started to get boring but the fear of work still seemed daunting and all that was left after the whirl wind of adolescent worries was boredom and angst. The days blended together into weeks, then months and soon the tabloids weren't filled with Jim's smug face and Sherlock Holmes' stupid hat.  
Sebastian sat on the edge of his bed, staring down at his crotch with a look of pure disdain. He felt pathetic, he felt like a failure but mostly he felt empty. He hadn't even thought about sex since the night before the fall when Jim had fucked him until he was begging for him to take a break. It'd seemed like nothing they did that night could satisfy the little man's hunger, Sebastian understood, Jim had never planned on getting it again.

"Have you t-t-tried?" Richard squeaked through the open door. 

Sebastian didn't bother looking up before replying, "I can't..." 

Richard tentatively entered the room and knelled by Sebastian's feet. "Me either," he stated honestly, a faint blush covering his cheeks that made Sebastian angry. The man looked just like Jim. Jim would have never blushed. "When Jim was fucking me before... before," the words got stuck and the man gave up, "he told me that you belonged to me now. That you were my pet." 

Sebastian raised a brow and looked down at the tiny little thing. He doubted the kid could "own" anyone but still he humored him. "Is that so?"

"Y-yes but... but I don't want to own anyone and I could never make you forget Jimmy. I'm not Jim but... but I could try to make you feel better." He placed a hand on Sebastian's inner thigh.

"I feel fine."

"N-no you don't. You cry at night y-you know... in your dreams. I've heard you." Sebastian's back tensed and he shifted away from Richard. "Sebastian, you don't have to be strong. I loved him too. He shouldn't have done this to us." His eyes got big with the threat of tears and he looked up at the solider who could easily crush him if he were so inclined, "but he left us each other. I can make you feel better... or...or at least I can try." 

Sebastian glanced around the room as if he was afraid that someone might see them but eventually, his shoulders loosened and he smiled down at Richard. "Show me what you got bunny."


End file.
